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Join Lori on January 18 &19, 2025 for
Terry Real’s

Relationship Bootcamp

Lori Irwin, RLT Certified Facilitator and Coach

A Transformative 2-Day Workshop in
Santa Barbara, California
for Couples and Individuals

Learn more
New Year, New

Your relationship can be better.
I can help.

Lori Cashman Irwin and Terry Real

Hi, I’m Lori Cashman Irwin and I’m a Certified Relational Life Therapy Coach. RLT is an approach that is supported by neuroscience and evidence-based outcomes. Founded by the long-time successful couples’ therapist and author, Terry Real, this methodology differs from traditional talk-therapy and standard marriage counseling approaches.  RLT involves a relational discovery process that brings to light the unsuccessful patterns and stances where many couples find themselves stuck; unconsciously.  Then we get to the roots of how those stances came to be. RLT gets to the heart of the matter.

The key to lasting change in a relationship is seeing the relationship and yourself in a new light, understanding the template you brought into the relationship, and learning a new set of skills that are extremely teachable.

Other therapies teach you skills; we work with the part of you that won’t use them. — Terry Real

A satisfying, truly intimate and connected relationship is waiting for you on the other side.  There is no other investment you could make that will affect the quality of your life more than an investment in the quality of your relationship.

I offer online RLT couples counseling and I work with couples from all over the world. If you’re interested in setting up a free consult call, click the button below.

Get started today

With profound skill, gentleness, strength, and wisdom, Lori has helped my partner and me through some seemingly intractable impasses. Lori is deeply grounded in the Relational Life Therapy framework, which she uses in a very connected, warm, patient, loving, powerful way to support us through our challenges. We feel really blessed to have chosen her as our ongoing therapist.

You really took us from some of our darkest days to some of our happiest and we feel we have the tools to maintain that now. We owe it all to you!
When we reflect on where we were as individuals and as a couple compared to now, it is remarkable how much growth and change has happened in our relationship. Undoubtedly we wouldn’t be in the position we are in if it weren’t for you.

Lori provided crucial, skillful support for us at a time of great pain in our marriage. She helped me speak up more bravely and effectively, and she helped my husband see, understand, and gradually change behaviors that were deeply damaging to our relationship. Since working with her we are now able to repair conflicts on our own and to trust that our relationship has a strong foundation for continued growth.

I learned a lot by meeting with Lori and by reflecting, and by working through, and putting into practice many RLT tools. We’re still practicing these skills and have moved toward a better understanding of each other and ourselves in our relationship together and with others… I highly recommend Lori as a skilled RLT practitioner. Meeting with her and doing the course and reading RLT content has been a very worthwhile investment. I’ve recommended RLT therapy and courses to many of my friends. Thanks, Lori!

— KN